Methods Of Psychological Mistreatment And How It Feels, Gaslighting

Gaslighting is a kind of psychological abuse in which a person or group purposefully makes someone question their own mental state, memories, or perception of reality. Those who experience gaslighting often feel confused, apprehensive, and unable to trust their own judgment. The 1938 play Gas Light, in which a guy tries to drive his wife nuts by changing the gas-powered lights in their house and then denying any changes when his wife points them out, is where the phrase "gaslighting" originally appeared.

Being a very effective kind of emotional abuse that makes the victim question their emotions, intuitions, and sanity, gaslighting has a significant impact on the abusive spouse (as abuse is primarily about power and control). The victim is more likely to stay in an unhealthy relationship if their abusive spouse is successful at shattering their victim's faith in their views.

Techniques

Here are a few of the several methods an abusive spouse may employ:

A spouse who withholds information or pretends not to hear the victim's worries.

Even if the victim's memory of the events is accurate, it is being disputed.

Blocking or diverting: The abusive spouse changes the subject or probes the victim's perspective.

The needs or feelings of the victim are trivialized, making them appear unimportant.

Negation: The partner denies making commitments to the victim or behaves as if they have forgotten the occurrence.

The Way It Feels

Some of the things a person could encounter while they are being gaslighted by someone are as follows:

having a persistent sense of confusion or of going crazy.
Asking oneself often questions (such as "Am I being overly sensitive?" and "Did that really happen?").
having trouble trusting oneself and other people.
often taking the blame when something goes wrong (thinking everything is their fault).
unduly feeling the need to apologize.
making justifications for or justification of the harmful activities of others.
feeling that they must provide proof for everything.
having a variety of information to support their positions.
having a bad feeling but being unable to put your finger on what it is.
feeling alone and misunderstood on a regular basis.

It could seem absolutely innocent at first. The harmful behaviors just keep compounding over time. The victim may then begin to experience confusion, anxiety, loneliness, and depression as a result of the spouse. They can eventually lose all sense of reality and begin to depend more on their lover.